Lorie Johnson – CBN
Christmas is supposed to be a time of joy, but unfortunately, a growing number of people dread this holiday season because of all the stress it can bring.
Christmas decorating, shopping, cooking, entertaining, and much more can leave people feeling empty and frazzled.
Licensed professional counselor Debra Fileta, author of Soul Care, told CBN News caregivers often feel more burned-out than others, but tend to keep their unhappiness hidden.
“I really think that people-pleasers struggle the most during this time of year,” she said, “Because they have so many things to be responsible for, so many people to try and make happy.”
Fileta believes holiday burnout can usually be traced to one root cause. “We do more than we should be doing,” she said.
Fileta says while this busyness may be filled with good intentions, finding Christmas joy involves learning to say no.
“This is one that we struggle with the most around the holidays,” she said, “Because rather than looking at what God has called us to do, which is to savor this season of the birth of a savior, we often get focused on the obligations around us.”
Fileta says a key to enjoying this time of year means taking a cue from the Bible and being less of a Martha and more like Mary.
“Martha was doing all the preparations,” she said, “I think that’s most of us during the holidays preparing and running around and our schedules are filled up. But Mary was the one that sat at the feet of Jesus, and Jesus said to her, ‘This is the good thing you have chosen.’ What is good? Only one thing is needed in this season, and that is savoring our relationship with Jesus.”
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The best way to savor our relationship with Jesus is to spend more one-on-one time with God, looking to Jesus as an example.
“Jesus was really good at withdrawing, drawing a circle of protection around his energy levels and making sure to get away with the Father,” she said, “Because he knew that in order for him to pour out, he had to be intentional about filling his soul with his relationship with the Father.”
Guarding against burnout also involves getting enough rest, Fileta says, pointing again to the example of Jesus.
“He wasn’t in a hurry. It wasn’t a go, go, go, hustle, hustle, hustle kind of life. He paced himself. Many times the Bible talks about how he was wearied with his journey and he stopped to rest,” she said, “One of my favorite passages in Mark where he stops to take a rest on the boat. Jesus took a nap.”
Practicing gratitude is another move that will produce more joy this Christmas.
“How often do we stop and just give thanks? Call out the things that are in front of us, the gifts that God has given us today to really enjoy the moment rather than be distracted in the moment,” Fileta said, “I think that’s a really important practice for us, especially around the holidays.”
We can enhance our sense of gratitude by being mindful, that is, by paying attention to the blessings right in front of us, right now.
“Mindfulness just means being present in our mind, in our heart,” Fileta said, “One activity that I suggest is just taking five minutes to sit somewhere, could be outside, could even be inside. And engage each of your senses.”
While making changes like this may not be easy or popular, it will be worth the effort and may increase your Christmas joy. These choices can also keep you healthier because less stress translates into a stronger immune system, which is a great return on your investment.